JOURNAL — TAPE #521, SIDE #1
Q: Mark Russell Bell
(TRANSCRIBER’S NOTE: I AM CONTINUING A TAROT CARD READING FOR MYSELF WHICH I BEGAN AT THE END OF THE PREVIOUS TAPE. THIS WAS TRANSCRIBED THE SAME EVENING, MARCH 16, 1998. THE SAME AFTERNOON I PURCHASED TWO ART PIECES VIA CREDIT CARD FOR ‘MIGHAEL’S MUSEUM’ [THE MUSEUM I AM PROPOSING] — A PAINTING OF THE ARCHANGEL (FROM LYN SHERER OF THE SANTA MONICA ANTIQUE MARKET) AND A SCULPTURE DEPICTING PAUL REVERE’S RIDE (FROM CANDACE AND MARLIN MILLER AT THE SAME LOCATION); THE PERSON WHO ASSISTED ME WAS FERNANDO GIRONE. THE COLLECTION OF PRICELESS ART TREASURES I HAVE ASSEMBLED IS STRIKING EVIDENCE OF GOD IN A SOCIETY OBSESSED WITH MONEY AND COST WITHOUT OFTEN PAYING ATTENTION TO HIGHER VALUES THAT HAVE WORTH BEYOND DOLLARS AND CENTS. I ALSO BROUGHT HOME TWO SMALL BOOKS FROM THE LOCAL THRIFT SHOP: I THINK I LOVE YOU SO I BROUGHT YOU THIS BOOK EDITED BY PAUL MURPHY; AND LOVE POEMS FOR THE VERY MARRIED BY LOIS WYSE. ON THE “COAST TO COAST AM” BROADCAST OF MARCH 18/19, ART BELL STATED THAT HE HAD CHANGED HIS TELEPHONE NUMBER AND WAS CONCERNED THAT THE FOLLOWING EVENING’S GUEST WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO CONTACT HIM.)
Q: So the questioner card — (“I[S]”) King of Swords, which reminds me to point out (“THAT”) there are positive and negative poles to each card so it depends (upon) which pole I’m at (at the) present time that would determine whether or not this card represented courage and force and power or superiority, aggression, cruelty.
( . . . )
Q: So let’s see what the environmental factors card is. The Star.
( . . . )
Q: Well, that’s an encouraging card. So my inner emotions card is The Tower.
( . . . )
Q: So that’s a terrible card showing my inner fears as opposed to my hopes. I guess I am coming from a place of fear at the moment. How could that not be in this society?
( . . . )
Q: I feel a pain in my stomach just thinking about all this.
( . . . )
Q: But I still see a positive pole to this card too because —
( . . . )
Q: — my hopes are to disrupt the status quo. Anyway —
( . . . )
Q: Let’s see what the final result card is.
( . . . )
Q: The Devil. Why do I always get so many Major Arcana cards?
( . . . )
Q: So my little instructions booklet says (“THAT”) this final result card “shows the culmination and results which will be brought about from all of the influences as revealed by the other cards if events and influences continue as indicated.” The Devil. Yuck. “Violence. Ravage. Bondage. Subordination. Subservience. Downfall. Weird experience. Bad outside influence or advice. Black magic. Dependency upon another person.” It’s not a very positive card but I guess it’s all how you look at it. It might be metaphorical for the world.
( . . . )
Q: So I guess this whole anecdote is a good commercial against reading Tarot cards. If I wasn’t upset before I certainly am now.
( . . . )
Q: I wanted The World card and instead I got The Devil card.
( . . . )
Q: So I don’t understand — I’m not very good at interpreting these cards. I don’t really see why if one just tries to share love in the world he gets a card like this. Let’s see what the next card in the deck is. To see if it will put this card into a little bit more (clear) perspective. Temperance. Oh isn’t that cute. Mighael always has a surprise. The Angel card.
( . . . )
Q: I wish I had gotten that card before. Maybe if I concentrate on being more loving.
( . . . )
Q: So I’m just sitting here upset now. It seems like all my life I’ve had difficulty creating opportunities for myself. I still don’t know how to do that. I’ve surrendered my life and will to God so why am I getting The Devil card? I’ve tried to show initiative and spread the Word. I’ve tried to deliver my message. No one else is willing to —
( . . . )
Q: — share it. I just wish there was some way of succeeding. So, anyway, what I’ve decided to do is to remain open to Mighael’s or God’s leading me to fulfill what’s best for everyone. I’m waiting for helpful Messages. I think I’ll take a walk to the post office and down Main Street. Maybe I’ll get a little bit of money out of the bank. I have to get a job. If something doesn’t happen — I don’t really want to have a radio show. I don’t want to have anything to do with Art after all these experiences. It’s obvious he’s very bad news. But what do I do? I don’t want to sell one of my art pieces. I wish I could just put my tapes on the Internet in Real Audio format but I can’t afford that. How do — what do I do?
( . . . )
Q: So I guess this is the part in my book where I have to repent and atone for all of my many sins that I’ve revealed in the course of these tapes; forgive everyone for my interpretations, which may or may not be correct — just for the way I’ve manipulated things. I’d much rather be a quiet person who doesn’t do tapes so maybe I’ll just — I’ve always tried to do what I thought would be best but I guess that’s sort of egotistical obviously if I get The Devil card. So I guess I should just say I really don’t have any hard feelings against anyone or myself but I’m not — I’m proud and I’m not proud of my actions. I just apologize and repent for all of my sins and I forgive everyone else theirs.
( . . . )
Q: I do have Love inside of me and I do see that as the major power in the world. My major objective has always been to share the Love that I have found. Obviously, things haven’t quite turned out that way in my own actions. I guess I’d better get this tape (transcript) put up on the Internet real quick. (“YEAH”)
( . . . )
Q: Or is that even important? I don’t even know — see, I don’t know what to do. I know I feel Loved. I know I’ve made bad judgements. But I still think I have to communicate truth. I guess I’ve been too judgmental about it. I haven’t been gentle with people, have I? I don’t know.
( . . . )
Q: It’s hard addressing religious subjects.
( . . . )
Q: So maybe this time I can stop doing tapes. I’ll end them with me atoning and repenting, forgiving, apologizing. Obviously, nobody can know the Heart and Mind of God. We all try to share it — us people who’ve had our spiritual awakenings. But I guess the lesson here is these are just metaphors that can help us engage in our own —
( . . . )
Q: — relationship with God/Spirit/Spirits/The Unknowable.
( . . . )
Q: So let’s see. I’m going to ask Mighael a question — pull out a card from the deck of Tarot cards. Because I would never want to do anything — when you’re given a mission you don’t want to end it unless — you want to do what God wants, what’s best for everyone.
( . . . )
Q: Will this be a good place to stop taping and keeping a journal? Being so public with everything?
( . . . )
Q: So the One of Cups came up. So I’m taking that as a ‘YES.’ I’m sure a lot of — whoops!
Q: So the questioner card — (“I[S]”) King of Swords, which reminds me to point out (“THAT”) there are positive and negative poles to each card so it depends (upon) which pole I’m at (at the) present time that would determine whether or not this card represented courage and force and power or superiority, aggression, cruelty.
( . . . )
Q: So let’s see what the environmental factors card is. The Star.
( . . . )
Q: Well, that’s an encouraging card. So my inner emotions card is The Tower.
( . . . )
Q: So that’s a terrible card showing my inner fears as opposed to my hopes. I guess I am coming from a place of fear at the moment. How could that not be in this society?
( . . . )
Q: I feel a pain in my stomach just thinking about all this.
( . . . )
Q: But I still see a positive pole to this card too because —
( . . . )
Q: — my hopes are to disrupt the status quo. Anyway —
( . . . )
Q: Let’s see what the final result card is.
( . . . )
Q: The Devil. Why do I always get so many Major Arcana cards?
( . . . )
Q: So my little instructions booklet says (“THAT”) this final result card “shows the culmination and results which will be brought about from all of the influences as revealed by the other cards if events and influences continue as indicated.” The Devil. Yuck. “Violence. Ravage. Bondage. Subordination. Subservience. Downfall. Weird experience. Bad outside influence or advice. Black magic. Dependency upon another person.” It’s not a very positive card but I guess it’s all how you look at it. It might be metaphorical for the world.
( . . . )
Q: So I guess this whole anecdote is a good commercial against reading Tarot cards. If I wasn’t upset before I certainly am now.
( . . . )
Q: I wanted The World card and instead I got The Devil card.
( . . . )
Q: So I don’t understand — I’m not very good at interpreting these cards. I don’t really see why if one just tries to share love in the world he gets a card like this. Let’s see what the next card in the deck is. To see if it will put this card into a little bit more (clear) perspective. Temperance. Oh isn’t that cute. Mighael always has a surprise. The Angel card.
( . . . )
Q: I wish I had gotten that card before. Maybe if I concentrate on being more loving.
( . . . )
Q: So I’m just sitting here upset now. It seems like all my life I’ve had difficulty creating opportunities for myself. I still don’t know how to do that. I’ve surrendered my life and will to God so why am I getting The Devil card? I’ve tried to show initiative and spread the Word. I’ve tried to deliver my message. No one else is willing to —
( . . . )
Q: — share it. I just wish there was some way of succeeding. So, anyway, what I’ve decided to do is to remain open to Mighael’s or God’s leading me to fulfill what’s best for everyone. I’m waiting for helpful Messages. I think I’ll take a walk to the post office and down Main Street. Maybe I’ll get a little bit of money out of the bank. I have to get a job. If something doesn’t happen — I don’t really want to have a radio show. I don’t want to have anything to do with Art after all these experiences. It’s obvious he’s very bad news. But what do I do? I don’t want to sell one of my art pieces. I wish I could just put my tapes on the Internet in Real Audio format but I can’t afford that. How do — what do I do?
( . . . )
Q: So I guess this is the part in my book where I have to repent and atone for all of my many sins that I’ve revealed in the course of these tapes; forgive everyone for my interpretations, which may or may not be correct — just for the way I’ve manipulated things. I’d much rather be a quiet person who doesn’t do tapes so maybe I’ll just — I’ve always tried to do what I thought would be best but I guess that’s sort of egotistical obviously if I get The Devil card. So I guess I should just say I really don’t have any hard feelings against anyone or myself but I’m not — I’m proud and I’m not proud of my actions. I just apologize and repent for all of my sins and I forgive everyone else theirs.
( . . . )
Q: I do have Love inside of me and I do see that as the major power in the world. My major objective has always been to share the Love that I have found. Obviously, things haven’t quite turned out that way in my own actions. I guess I’d better get this tape (transcript) put up on the Internet real quick. (“YEAH”)
( . . . )
Q: Or is that even important? I don’t even know — see, I don’t know what to do. I know I feel Loved. I know I’ve made bad judgements. But I still think I have to communicate truth. I guess I’ve been too judgmental about it. I haven’t been gentle with people, have I? I don’t know.
( . . . )
Q: It’s hard addressing religious subjects.
( . . . )
Q: So maybe this time I can stop doing tapes. I’ll end them with me atoning and repenting, forgiving, apologizing. Obviously, nobody can know the Heart and Mind of God. We all try to share it — us people who’ve had our spiritual awakenings. But I guess the lesson here is these are just metaphors that can help us engage in our own —
( . . . )
Q: — relationship with God/Spirit/Spirits/The Unknowable.
( . . . )
Q: So let’s see. I’m going to ask Mighael a question — pull out a card from the deck of Tarot cards. Because I would never want to do anything — when you’re given a mission you don’t want to end it unless — you want to do what God wants, what’s best for everyone.
( . . . )
Q: Will this be a good place to stop taping and keeping a journal? Being so public with everything?
( . . . )
Q: So the One of Cups came up. So I’m taking that as a ‘YES.’ I’m sure a lot of — whoops!